Rev

It was one of the coldest nights I could remember.
Chills ran down my spine as if my body knew what I was about to experience.
It was the night I first saw her.

I went downstairs to the semi-basement bar.
It was just like every other Friday night.
Wooden walls, Victorian furniture, candles everywhere and a small fire burning in the fireplace at the darkest place of the room.
A jazz band playing slow-tempoed songs based on the piano and octobass.
I went to the corner table which -in my mind- was only MY table.
I ordered a glass of red wine, as always.

I looked around.
One of the things I liked so much in this place was the customers.
They are all in pairs or alone like me. They all kept their voices low, enjoying the rhythm of the bass.
Behind the bar was again that red-haired girl.
She looked at me and smiled.
But I didn't smile back.
She was really pretty, however she looked very young to me.
What did she know about life?
About loneliness?
About real love?

I turned my head toward the band... and my heart stopped.
Next to the small stage was a table submerged in shadows.
The only source of light was the fireplace next to it.
But I could see -or feel- her eyes.
The way the fire lit her face made me shiver.
And she was staring back at me.

Long dark hair.
Intense black eyes.
Tight black dress.
Her legs crossed but her hands inviting.
She was smoking while looking at me...

I tried to look away.
Pointless.
My muscles wouldn't obey me.
I knew they obeyed her now.
My eyes looked lower without me meaning to.
I still don't know if it was a trick of the fire or my mind, but her thighs looked wet.
And I couldn't explain it.

I realized I was sweating.
That night I understood that I had found hell in the shape of heaven.

In the following month I was going there every Friday and weekends.
She was always there.
At that very table.
In the shadows.
And she was always looking at me.
Her face had no expression.
Never.
Just looking at me... controlling me.

One Saturday night it felt different.
Nothing looked different - but I could feel it.
When I was done with my glass of wine, I decided it was time to leave.
A hard thing to do, but I had to.

It was another cold night.
I walked home looking down, as always.
A few meters away from my block I looked up.
And she was there.
I froze.
She was looking at me expectantly.
I decided I had to walk towards my apartment.
But she was in the way.
So I stopped in front of her... and inhaled her perfume.
She had a smell of burning roses.
Beautiful and scary.

She took a step and wrapped her arms around me.
In an instant our tongues collapsed.
Passion had me almost paralysed.

I can't even recall how we ended up in my apartment.
But I can clearly remember my lips caressing her bosom.
I remember the sense of her cold, wet thighs around my waist.
I remember how it felt inside her.
Like I was in the dark side of heaven.
Or in the beautiful side of hell.

I knew that woman would be the end of me.
I knew she was the devil.

Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.
But, Father... I would be a liar if I said that I have regrets.

And that's how I ended up in hell.